Monday, November 16, 2009
Thursday, November 5, 2009
The Yogi has landed!
Well i made it home safely from India. After a couple of days of gathering myself I thought I would update. I will continue to add things to this blog while I am home as I have time and can remember some of my experiences. So fell free to keep checking. Also i will add all of my pictures.
My trip home was pretty intense but fun none the less. WE left the ashram at 1:30 pm on Sunday November 1st. WE took the Ashram Jeep because our drivers car had gotten a flat tire. We squeezed 7 people in a five person space but the rule is "always room in Indian Car!" So we had Sherina, Sitske and Danesha our driver in the front seat and me, Melissa, Anson and Ashina jammed in the back seat.
Now my SI joint totally went out on me saturday and I was as crooked as could be. Again my plevis was twisted so that my left leg was an inch shorter than my right leg and I had a major lean going on. I was in a ton of pain. Saturday night while everyone was out eating banaffee pie and nutella pancakes, I was lying on my floor with my legs propped on my bed meditating on my little Ganesha statue. Ganesha is the elephant and the remover of obstacles. Alas he did not remove my spine so I had to grin and bear it. So I asked my physio friend Helen and she said that I could not damage my spine by travelling in so much pain, that my pain was muscular, and to just load up on my muscle realaxers, ibuprofen and vicodin. All of which I am so grateful I have saved up over the past couple of years becasue I really needed them on Sunday. So sunday came and I was still in agony, Vishva came and tried to manipulate me but to no avail, my neighbor practiced reiki on me with zero results and my desperate attempt to Get Madvi to please try her matrix healing on me again failed. She was really sick, so was I actually, both her roomate and mine had, had really bad colds and so we both were the lucky recipients of the virus. SO it was hard for her to expend energy on healing me if she didnt have any. So I had to suck it up and go anyway. Luckily it was Sunday and Karma Yoga day so my neighbor Krista packed my bags for me. She was soo sweet and a very good packer. It was a good lesson in giving up control for me too. Im not always good at asking for help or letting people take care of my things for me. Melissa and some of the other girls were nice enough to take my bags out to the car for me. My backpack was 40lbs on the way to India plus I filled a whole duffle bag full of Xmas gifts for my entire family and lots of friends. Aye. Thank God for friends to help me out with all of that!
Melissa was the best friend I could have had through out all of this. She and I had the exact same flight from Chicago to delhi and from Delhi to chicago. SO she arranged the car and got all my bags and totally hooked me up. She really took care of me. We were even able to sit next to eachother on the plane and at the airport she loaded my bags for me.
So being squished in the back seat of the jeep was honestly the best thing for my obscured pelvis. We were all nice and jammed in so I was well supported for the NINE hour drive to Delhi. The drive was insane. Everyone in India was on the road that day. We were bobbing and weaving and screeching to a halt every five feet. CArs and motorcylces and buses would scream toward us head on aND BLARE THEIR HORNS and peel off at the last second. And it is true about India. There was this huge traffic jam and when we finally all drove around the obstacle in the middle of the raod it was three cows just lying on the middle of the street lazing away, tails swishing carefree back and forth. It was hysterical. And the dust! Oh my the dust. there was not one cubic inch of air that was not densley packed with Indian dust. All of the trees along side the road were no longer green but tan. The air had a bronze to it. It made for a most dusky rose red beautiful sunset however.
Despite all of that, the weather was absolutely perfect and it felt wonderful to have the windows open. Even though everytime I stopped smiling and my lipps closed over my teeth I had a pound of grit stuck to them! We made the best of it. We chanted every mantra we knew. We chanted the healing mantra, the ashram sang it it us as wel left too. We chanted the Gyatri mantra, Shanti mantra the joytir mantra and when the traffic jam was really bad we chanted to Ganesha to remove our obstacle. We sang to Shiva and to our inner guru and all of the above. It is so nice to know that wherever I go I will have those songs in my heart and I can draw on my world yoga family for support when I need them.
We did make one stop on our way to the Airport at the Chetal Grand Cafe. We were singing Hare Chetal. We were so happy to stop and eat. We did actually have to pee too but we were all so dehydrated from the dust. I drank over three litres of water in the six hours before we stopped. If that was a normal car ride I would have had to pee at least 3-4 times :) We were all starving. We had eaten lunch at the Ashram before we left, my favorite, yellow dal Mmmm. So we hadnt eaten in like 7 hours. We all shared oranges and dried fruit and nuts and some chocolate but we were starving. So we ate the Chetal Grand, we all ordered veggie burgers and they had grilled cheese. Sitske dontaed a portion of her grilled cheeze to me. It was soo divine. i hadnt had bread or real (?) cheeze in 30 days. We all got our veggie burgers and ravished them. I wolfed my nearly all the way down before I realized there was lettuce and mayonnaise and tomato on it. We all got a little panicked. We hadnt eaten any of that stuff because we were unsure of its saftey. My mind immediately pictured spewing dirreha and vomitting on a 15 hour plane ride with a broken back. Luckily my Grapefruit seed extract was handy and we all downed a huge dose of it. That stuff is amazing it cures everything! I highly reccommend it. Anyway none of us got sick. the traffic was crazy as we neared Delhi. they actually have traffic lights in Delhi. There was one point were we were in an intersection with a roundabout and cars merging in every single direction all horns a blaring, it was so enmassed with cars i coulndt even make out where the road was. It was hysterical I couldnt stop laughing the Chaos was too perfect I have never experienced anything like it. It was like when bees do their dance and there is this huge swarm and all of them are crawling over top of eachother and twisting and turning in different directions only it was a mass of cars, bikes busses and what not. I just had to laugh! They say that God lives in india simply because of situations like that. There is no order, no control, yet everyone makes it through and no one gets hurt. It makes America feel like a bunch of babies to me. We cant do anything here with out a sign or a rule. India it is all common sense. Its pretty craky and kinda cool.
So we dropped off Anson and Sherina at the Hotel and blazed to the airport. At the airport police can stop you and if you have too many people in your car they can give you a fine and male you walk the rest of the way in. So we were violating the seatbelt law in Delhi and therefore had to dop off our two folks. We made it to the airport by 1030 pm. Delhi airport has free baggage carts everywhere and Melissa got one and loaded up our bags. My back was really feeling the ride by this time. It was very quick and we got our bags checked and the counter agent was able to get my and melissa's seat right behind eachother. We got cheked in, made it through check point one of three for security, went potty... ahhhhh and I was able to call my husband and immediately went to board the plane. So down the hallway to board the plane they searched our carry ons again and made us relinquish the water we had jusst purchased. Apparently we needed a receipt. So then we walked a little further and then had to take our shoes off and get wanded. The lady at our first security chekpoint who wanded me was so tired her eyes were bloody red and she nodded off standing up as i walked up to her! That's a long shift! Anyway we made it on to our plane and the gentleman who was sitting next to Mel agreed to trade seats with me so I could sit next to her in the Isle seat. Thank GOD! And alas we embarked on our 15 hour plane ride! They served us some food right away and gave us a snack bag and informed us that we would get breakfast 90 ins before landing in Chicago. I was so tired and on so many pills all I wanted to do was sleep but I could absolutely not get comfortable. My back was spasming so bad. sending jolts making my whole body twitch. I couldnt bear it anymore so I took a walk to the toilet. and then went to beg for mercy from the flight attendants. They ahd this rather large galley in the back of the plane. SO I went back there and they said "yes" and I just strted balling. I couldnt even get one word out and I was just sobbing. I amangaed to beg them to please let me ly on the floor for a little while and that my back hurt soo bad. they were so amazingly wonderful and accommodating. The two ladies got me a blanket to lie on and two pillows one for my head and one for my legs and the one lady even flattened a plastic water bottle and filled it woth ot water so I could use it as a heating pad. Iw as never more grateful in my whole life! Now mind you these two stewerdesses had just flown to Delhi from Chicago, a 15hour flight got four hours of sleep and then RAN A MARATHON in delhi and got back on their flight to go back to Chicago! Holy crap! they were amazing!!!!! They let me lie ther for over two hours. SO I actually got to sleep lying down for a bit! It was heavenly. im pretty sure they saved my life! SO after I left the floor we still had like EIGHT hours to go! I thinkg I walked around the whole plane a good dozen times. I think some of the people up front werre getting sick of seeing me. The two sections ahead of ours were the Elite business class and they had the reclineing chairs that fully laid out so they were almost verticle. I was trying to practice kindness to those that are happy but I was very envious. One couple even had their two children, like 5 and six years old all stretched out cozy in their jammies each in their own fully reclining seat. Lucky little varmits! Everyone was all curled up with pillows and burried in their blankets a few poeple were even snoring. They all looked so peaceful. I guess I could have been that peaceful if I would have shelled out $5 grand for a ticket too! Alas I only that the $1000 ticket.
The flight was very smooth and the service was great. I highly reccommend American Airlines for your long distance travel. They did me well. WE flew directly over the north pole to come home. It was quite bizzarre. We flew into darkness the entire 15 hour ride. It was quite bizzarre because for six hours of the car ride and then two hours at the airport and then 15 hours inthe plane we were in complete night time. We arrived in Chicago at 440am it was of course dark! We arrived before customs opened so we had to wait 10 minutes on the plane. Customs was a piece of cake actually. I had an apple on me that they took away but other than that it was pretty easy going. Melissa and I were so happy to be off the plane we got some pics together. We went and had a second breakfast to celebrate being able to eat food again. I had a cheeze omlete with some potatoes and Mel got toast with guacamole and yogurt with granola and fresh fruit. I was so excited to get my food and when it arrived I realized I couldnt really eat it. It was soo greasy my stomach churned just looking at it. we had been eating so clean and pure at the Ashram that it seemed silly. I wailed on the cheeziest part of the omlete but was sorely dissapointed. I no longer like greasy food I think. Grease is what i used to live for and here I am now tasting it for what it really was. It was heartbreaking for me. Now I know what my husband is talking about. I could only eat two of the tater wedges they gave me too. I found my eyes gazing longingly at melissas fruti and granola. She was really nice to me and shared her guacamole with me which I promptly spread on my toast and Jackpot!!! Oh how I have misssed garlic. The guac was so garlicy I was in heaven. Suddenly all was well in the world again. I didnt need any stupid eggs or potatoes or grease. I can have guac and toast. I might eat this everyday for breakfast. Mmmmmmm. our waitress probably thought we were freaks especially beacus we asked for plain hot water! We wanted hot water with lime, we drank that every morning at the ashram before yoga. its a natural cleanser to get the digestion stimulated! It works too :)
Anyway Shortly after our feast the sun started to rise and we welcomed it with rejoicing hearts. We sat at Melissas gate she was leaving at 830 am to head to colorado. Agian I was jealous I had to wait till 1115 to leave to tampa. Her flight started boarding and we were soo sad to part. This was it we had to part our separate ways. We at least had eachother to remind us of our glorious time at the ashram. We both had the same experiences and had shared so much with eachother along this perilous journey to get home. She was my crutch I had her to count on to help me and now I was alone. I gave her a big teary hug and sent her off with the healing mantra. Wondering when the next time i will be able to sing that with somone who knows what it means. I walked with my head down to my gate feeling very alone and scared and really tired. I amde some calls to my family and let them know I was home. I met a really nivce polish guy who asked me to watch his bags while he went to the bathroom. I was kind nervous for a minute but he came back with a big grateful smile and some McDonalds. I cant even imagine what eating a Mc Donalds breakfast sandwhich would do to my intestines!
I then found out my gate was changed so I hobbled over and sat directly in the most sunniest direct sun rayz possible. Just so happy to see the sun. It was nearing 9am and I hadnt slept more then 45 minutees strainght in over 30 hours! I started freking out feeling super crazy like I had just been in a time rip in a Stephen King novel. I didnt know what was happening or where I was. Did I even go to India? Oh my god! Did I? Did I really even go? What day is it? I left Sunday at 130 and now its monday at 9 am? But I travelled for 30 hours but how is this all possible? I was so scared "what if I just dreamed all of this?" I started to cry in desperation. I called Nick sobbing, "Nick did I really just go to India? I cant even tell. I dont even know what day it is" Nick wasnt sure if I had really gone either which wasnt really helpful. But he did say it was Monday November 2nd. So that helped a little. I hung up and laid on my side on my bags and did some serious deep breathing. Some good Analoma Viloma breathing we learned in yoga. I very quickly fell asleep for an hour and half! I awoke to my plane boarding. Finally only one more leg and I am home. I felt more like a human being after my nap which I was so grateful for. I thought I was really looneybins for a minute. The 2hours and 35 minute to Tampa felt so unbeleivably fast after a 15 hour plane ride it was almost a joke.
As soon as we got off the plane in Tampa and I walked down to the baggage both of my bags were right there. I had the porter grab them, I saw nick drive up and I was on my way. The porter and i walked up to the car and I had so many emotions swirling through my head on top of gross fatigue that the first words out of my mouth to Nick were, "Did you forget that my back was broken?!" my poor husband slumped in defeat. I was so happy to see him but yet i was picturing him greetin me inside the airport and being there to help me with my bags and then he parked as far away as possible and I was sooo tired and dirty and smelly. Oh it was such a mess so I sobbed the whole way home apologizing profusely. Im soooo sorry. I was soo happy to see him, so happy he was there everything worked out perfectly I dont know why I took that out on him. Thankfully my husband is very sweet and took mercy on me and forgave me. He was dissapointed too he wasnt there to greet me and help me with my bags and he had left in plenty of time to get there but the base was having a drill so he drove all the way to the main gate and it was closed. I felt so horrible so i apologized at least a thousand more times. I sobbed the ENITRE drive home. Tears of sobbing joy at the smell of the Clean Salty air, tears of joy at the sunshine, tears of joy that I dont have to sit on a plane any longer, tears of joy that I couldnt wait to take a shower and then a bath. We made it home and I sobbed squeezing my furry doggie whose whole body was quivering at her mommy being home. she licked me and whined and cried and did figure eights in my behalf. I immediately stripped off my clothes and took a hot shower scrubbing every square inch of my body TWICE. Then I plugged the drain and filled my tub with gallons of fresh clean hot water. Nick grabbed my salts for me and I dumped the rest of both containers in the tub and I laid back and sunk down and cried some more. It was so releiveing to take a bath. My body ached so badly I could barely stand up straight my low back my pelvis my legs and my ribs ached from being held in airplane chair position for so long. Iwas so sad and so happy to be home. I coulndt beleive it was over. How did that happen so fast? How could I really be home? Trying not to cling to the past I sunk into the tub deeper and told my husband how much I loved him!
My trip home was pretty intense but fun none the less. WE left the ashram at 1:30 pm on Sunday November 1st. WE took the Ashram Jeep because our drivers car had gotten a flat tire. We squeezed 7 people in a five person space but the rule is "always room in Indian Car!" So we had Sherina, Sitske and Danesha our driver in the front seat and me, Melissa, Anson and Ashina jammed in the back seat.
Now my SI joint totally went out on me saturday and I was as crooked as could be. Again my plevis was twisted so that my left leg was an inch shorter than my right leg and I had a major lean going on. I was in a ton of pain. Saturday night while everyone was out eating banaffee pie and nutella pancakes, I was lying on my floor with my legs propped on my bed meditating on my little Ganesha statue. Ganesha is the elephant and the remover of obstacles. Alas he did not remove my spine so I had to grin and bear it. So I asked my physio friend Helen and she said that I could not damage my spine by travelling in so much pain, that my pain was muscular, and to just load up on my muscle realaxers, ibuprofen and vicodin. All of which I am so grateful I have saved up over the past couple of years becasue I really needed them on Sunday. So sunday came and I was still in agony, Vishva came and tried to manipulate me but to no avail, my neighbor practiced reiki on me with zero results and my desperate attempt to Get Madvi to please try her matrix healing on me again failed. She was really sick, so was I actually, both her roomate and mine had, had really bad colds and so we both were the lucky recipients of the virus. SO it was hard for her to expend energy on healing me if she didnt have any. So I had to suck it up and go anyway. Luckily it was Sunday and Karma Yoga day so my neighbor Krista packed my bags for me. She was soo sweet and a very good packer. It was a good lesson in giving up control for me too. Im not always good at asking for help or letting people take care of my things for me. Melissa and some of the other girls were nice enough to take my bags out to the car for me. My backpack was 40lbs on the way to India plus I filled a whole duffle bag full of Xmas gifts for my entire family and lots of friends. Aye. Thank God for friends to help me out with all of that!
Melissa was the best friend I could have had through out all of this. She and I had the exact same flight from Chicago to delhi and from Delhi to chicago. SO she arranged the car and got all my bags and totally hooked me up. She really took care of me. We were even able to sit next to eachother on the plane and at the airport she loaded my bags for me.
So being squished in the back seat of the jeep was honestly the best thing for my obscured pelvis. We were all nice and jammed in so I was well supported for the NINE hour drive to Delhi. The drive was insane. Everyone in India was on the road that day. We were bobbing and weaving and screeching to a halt every five feet. CArs and motorcylces and buses would scream toward us head on aND BLARE THEIR HORNS and peel off at the last second. And it is true about India. There was this huge traffic jam and when we finally all drove around the obstacle in the middle of the raod it was three cows just lying on the middle of the street lazing away, tails swishing carefree back and forth. It was hysterical. And the dust! Oh my the dust. there was not one cubic inch of air that was not densley packed with Indian dust. All of the trees along side the road were no longer green but tan. The air had a bronze to it. It made for a most dusky rose red beautiful sunset however.
Despite all of that, the weather was absolutely perfect and it felt wonderful to have the windows open. Even though everytime I stopped smiling and my lipps closed over my teeth I had a pound of grit stuck to them! We made the best of it. We chanted every mantra we knew. We chanted the healing mantra, the ashram sang it it us as wel left too. We chanted the Gyatri mantra, Shanti mantra the joytir mantra and when the traffic jam was really bad we chanted to Ganesha to remove our obstacle. We sang to Shiva and to our inner guru and all of the above. It is so nice to know that wherever I go I will have those songs in my heart and I can draw on my world yoga family for support when I need them.
We did make one stop on our way to the Airport at the Chetal Grand Cafe. We were singing Hare Chetal. We were so happy to stop and eat. We did actually have to pee too but we were all so dehydrated from the dust. I drank over three litres of water in the six hours before we stopped. If that was a normal car ride I would have had to pee at least 3-4 times :) We were all starving. We had eaten lunch at the Ashram before we left, my favorite, yellow dal Mmmm. So we hadnt eaten in like 7 hours. We all shared oranges and dried fruit and nuts and some chocolate but we were starving. So we ate the Chetal Grand, we all ordered veggie burgers and they had grilled cheese. Sitske dontaed a portion of her grilled cheeze to me. It was soo divine. i hadnt had bread or real (?) cheeze in 30 days. We all got our veggie burgers and ravished them. I wolfed my nearly all the way down before I realized there was lettuce and mayonnaise and tomato on it. We all got a little panicked. We hadnt eaten any of that stuff because we were unsure of its saftey. My mind immediately pictured spewing dirreha and vomitting on a 15 hour plane ride with a broken back. Luckily my Grapefruit seed extract was handy and we all downed a huge dose of it. That stuff is amazing it cures everything! I highly reccommend it. Anyway none of us got sick. the traffic was crazy as we neared Delhi. they actually have traffic lights in Delhi. There was one point were we were in an intersection with a roundabout and cars merging in every single direction all horns a blaring, it was so enmassed with cars i coulndt even make out where the road was. It was hysterical I couldnt stop laughing the Chaos was too perfect I have never experienced anything like it. It was like when bees do their dance and there is this huge swarm and all of them are crawling over top of eachother and twisting and turning in different directions only it was a mass of cars, bikes busses and what not. I just had to laugh! They say that God lives in india simply because of situations like that. There is no order, no control, yet everyone makes it through and no one gets hurt. It makes America feel like a bunch of babies to me. We cant do anything here with out a sign or a rule. India it is all common sense. Its pretty craky and kinda cool.
So we dropped off Anson and Sherina at the Hotel and blazed to the airport. At the airport police can stop you and if you have too many people in your car they can give you a fine and male you walk the rest of the way in. So we were violating the seatbelt law in Delhi and therefore had to dop off our two folks. We made it to the airport by 1030 pm. Delhi airport has free baggage carts everywhere and Melissa got one and loaded up our bags. My back was really feeling the ride by this time. It was very quick and we got our bags checked and the counter agent was able to get my and melissa's seat right behind eachother. We got cheked in, made it through check point one of three for security, went potty... ahhhhh and I was able to call my husband and immediately went to board the plane. So down the hallway to board the plane they searched our carry ons again and made us relinquish the water we had jusst purchased. Apparently we needed a receipt. So then we walked a little further and then had to take our shoes off and get wanded. The lady at our first security chekpoint who wanded me was so tired her eyes were bloody red and she nodded off standing up as i walked up to her! That's a long shift! Anyway we made it on to our plane and the gentleman who was sitting next to Mel agreed to trade seats with me so I could sit next to her in the Isle seat. Thank GOD! And alas we embarked on our 15 hour plane ride! They served us some food right away and gave us a snack bag and informed us that we would get breakfast 90 ins before landing in Chicago. I was so tired and on so many pills all I wanted to do was sleep but I could absolutely not get comfortable. My back was spasming so bad. sending jolts making my whole body twitch. I couldnt bear it anymore so I took a walk to the toilet. and then went to beg for mercy from the flight attendants. They ahd this rather large galley in the back of the plane. SO I went back there and they said "yes" and I just strted balling. I couldnt even get one word out and I was just sobbing. I amangaed to beg them to please let me ly on the floor for a little while and that my back hurt soo bad. they were so amazingly wonderful and accommodating. The two ladies got me a blanket to lie on and two pillows one for my head and one for my legs and the one lady even flattened a plastic water bottle and filled it woth ot water so I could use it as a heating pad. Iw as never more grateful in my whole life! Now mind you these two stewerdesses had just flown to Delhi from Chicago, a 15hour flight got four hours of sleep and then RAN A MARATHON in delhi and got back on their flight to go back to Chicago! Holy crap! they were amazing!!!!! They let me lie ther for over two hours. SO I actually got to sleep lying down for a bit! It was heavenly. im pretty sure they saved my life! SO after I left the floor we still had like EIGHT hours to go! I thinkg I walked around the whole plane a good dozen times. I think some of the people up front werre getting sick of seeing me. The two sections ahead of ours were the Elite business class and they had the reclineing chairs that fully laid out so they were almost verticle. I was trying to practice kindness to those that are happy but I was very envious. One couple even had their two children, like 5 and six years old all stretched out cozy in their jammies each in their own fully reclining seat. Lucky little varmits! Everyone was all curled up with pillows and burried in their blankets a few poeple were even snoring. They all looked so peaceful. I guess I could have been that peaceful if I would have shelled out $5 grand for a ticket too! Alas I only that the $1000 ticket.
The flight was very smooth and the service was great. I highly reccommend American Airlines for your long distance travel. They did me well. WE flew directly over the north pole to come home. It was quite bizzarre. We flew into darkness the entire 15 hour ride. It was quite bizzarre because for six hours of the car ride and then two hours at the airport and then 15 hours inthe plane we were in complete night time. We arrived in Chicago at 440am it was of course dark! We arrived before customs opened so we had to wait 10 minutes on the plane. Customs was a piece of cake actually. I had an apple on me that they took away but other than that it was pretty easy going. Melissa and I were so happy to be off the plane we got some pics together. We went and had a second breakfast to celebrate being able to eat food again. I had a cheeze omlete with some potatoes and Mel got toast with guacamole and yogurt with granola and fresh fruit. I was so excited to get my food and when it arrived I realized I couldnt really eat it. It was soo greasy my stomach churned just looking at it. we had been eating so clean and pure at the Ashram that it seemed silly. I wailed on the cheeziest part of the omlete but was sorely dissapointed. I no longer like greasy food I think. Grease is what i used to live for and here I am now tasting it for what it really was. It was heartbreaking for me. Now I know what my husband is talking about. I could only eat two of the tater wedges they gave me too. I found my eyes gazing longingly at melissas fruti and granola. She was really nice to me and shared her guacamole with me which I promptly spread on my toast and Jackpot!!! Oh how I have misssed garlic. The guac was so garlicy I was in heaven. Suddenly all was well in the world again. I didnt need any stupid eggs or potatoes or grease. I can have guac and toast. I might eat this everyday for breakfast. Mmmmmmm. our waitress probably thought we were freaks especially beacus we asked for plain hot water! We wanted hot water with lime, we drank that every morning at the ashram before yoga. its a natural cleanser to get the digestion stimulated! It works too :)
Anyway Shortly after our feast the sun started to rise and we welcomed it with rejoicing hearts. We sat at Melissas gate she was leaving at 830 am to head to colorado. Agian I was jealous I had to wait till 1115 to leave to tampa. Her flight started boarding and we were soo sad to part. This was it we had to part our separate ways. We at least had eachother to remind us of our glorious time at the ashram. We both had the same experiences and had shared so much with eachother along this perilous journey to get home. She was my crutch I had her to count on to help me and now I was alone. I gave her a big teary hug and sent her off with the healing mantra. Wondering when the next time i will be able to sing that with somone who knows what it means. I walked with my head down to my gate feeling very alone and scared and really tired. I amde some calls to my family and let them know I was home. I met a really nivce polish guy who asked me to watch his bags while he went to the bathroom. I was kind nervous for a minute but he came back with a big grateful smile and some McDonalds. I cant even imagine what eating a Mc Donalds breakfast sandwhich would do to my intestines!
I then found out my gate was changed so I hobbled over and sat directly in the most sunniest direct sun rayz possible. Just so happy to see the sun. It was nearing 9am and I hadnt slept more then 45 minutees strainght in over 30 hours! I started freking out feeling super crazy like I had just been in a time rip in a Stephen King novel. I didnt know what was happening or where I was. Did I even go to India? Oh my god! Did I? Did I really even go? What day is it? I left Sunday at 130 and now its monday at 9 am? But I travelled for 30 hours but how is this all possible? I was so scared "what if I just dreamed all of this?" I started to cry in desperation. I called Nick sobbing, "Nick did I really just go to India? I cant even tell. I dont even know what day it is" Nick wasnt sure if I had really gone either which wasnt really helpful. But he did say it was Monday November 2nd. So that helped a little. I hung up and laid on my side on my bags and did some serious deep breathing. Some good Analoma Viloma breathing we learned in yoga. I very quickly fell asleep for an hour and half! I awoke to my plane boarding. Finally only one more leg and I am home. I felt more like a human being after my nap which I was so grateful for. I thought I was really looneybins for a minute. The 2hours and 35 minute to Tampa felt so unbeleivably fast after a 15 hour plane ride it was almost a joke.
As soon as we got off the plane in Tampa and I walked down to the baggage both of my bags were right there. I had the porter grab them, I saw nick drive up and I was on my way. The porter and i walked up to the car and I had so many emotions swirling through my head on top of gross fatigue that the first words out of my mouth to Nick were, "Did you forget that my back was broken?!" my poor husband slumped in defeat. I was so happy to see him but yet i was picturing him greetin me inside the airport and being there to help me with my bags and then he parked as far away as possible and I was sooo tired and dirty and smelly. Oh it was such a mess so I sobbed the whole way home apologizing profusely. Im soooo sorry. I was soo happy to see him, so happy he was there everything worked out perfectly I dont know why I took that out on him. Thankfully my husband is very sweet and took mercy on me and forgave me. He was dissapointed too he wasnt there to greet me and help me with my bags and he had left in plenty of time to get there but the base was having a drill so he drove all the way to the main gate and it was closed. I felt so horrible so i apologized at least a thousand more times. I sobbed the ENITRE drive home. Tears of sobbing joy at the smell of the Clean Salty air, tears of joy at the sunshine, tears of joy that I dont have to sit on a plane any longer, tears of joy that I couldnt wait to take a shower and then a bath. We made it home and I sobbed squeezing my furry doggie whose whole body was quivering at her mommy being home. she licked me and whined and cried and did figure eights in my behalf. I immediately stripped off my clothes and took a hot shower scrubbing every square inch of my body TWICE. Then I plugged the drain and filled my tub with gallons of fresh clean hot water. Nick grabbed my salts for me and I dumped the rest of both containers in the tub and I laid back and sunk down and cried some more. It was so releiveing to take a bath. My body ached so badly I could barely stand up straight my low back my pelvis my legs and my ribs ached from being held in airplane chair position for so long. Iwas so sad and so happy to be home. I coulndt beleive it was over. How did that happen so fast? How could I really be home? Trying not to cling to the past I sunk into the tub deeper and told my husband how much I loved him!
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